As long as he was in control, it didn’t matter to him the direction of his heart. Rage could be a beneficial tool in getting what he wanted. It felt good to let it all out when desired; holding back only when necessary. He had it all under control…
…until the day his heart became as stone.
Only in Him, the God of mercy, we have this hope:
I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you;
I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh.
Ezekial 36:26

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Every single one of your posts has articulated the thoughts in my head
Were we married to the same man? (aka alien, robot, vampire, devil)
God Bless You
S